Show Me Your Friends...

When you were younger and you were in school, you were open. Open to learning through observation. You were open to anyone who would play with you at the playground. And anyone who the teacher would place to sit next to you was automatically your friend. You had this need for validation from other than your family and caregivers. You wanted to be a part of a group. Joining a formal schooling in your youth was a window of opportunity to making those friendships. You all started with a blank slate, so you could literally be anything you wanted to be depending on what you set your mind to.

You developed similar interests along the way. Some students changed schools while new ones enrolled and you interacted with them, forming new bonds. Possibly maintaining the old ones but with some strain because if you were born before the early 00s, there wasn't modern tech to help maintain effecient communication. 

You probably joined a new high school yourself and started a new beginning as a young adult. You got to test your level of maturity as you evolved mentally. As people around you were growing into their own, alliances were made and influencers were easy to notice. You may or may not have been popular yourself. You may or may not have been bullied. You may or may not have bullied. 

You got into campus and had another fresh start. This time as a legal adult, fully accountable for your actions and liable to serve time if you refused to adhere to the laws that govern human beings. All the things you were instructed to do from your infancy were now presented to you as a choice, as to whether you wanted to carry out certain actions on your own without the keen eye of your guardians. You strived for academic excellence despite the challenges and appreciated the content as you started thinking more like a professional in your own right. You were so hopeful after your attachment to be aligned in just the right job, with just the right starting salary. Just hoping to build networks along the way to expand your career prospects and thus your finances. 

You got married. They were definitely not what you were expected when you first met all the way until you tied the knot. You were a nervous newlywed, hopeful about the future. Families gave their advice and said what you usually hear in almost every other wedding. You were wondering whether you were going to make it or whether you would become a divorce statistics because some of your colleagues weren't doing too good in their own unions. You may have prayed for an easier transition into parenthood, with all the uncertainty of being responsible and accountable of a little human, as they would continue to multiply. Watching them achieve their milestones, hit you that with every one of their achievements meant you were slowly aging. Now were started contemplating your legacy.

Throughout life, we are presented with scenarios around us that demand we make choices, in order for events to unfold either in our favour or to test us. When you were young, you never really had many decisions to make when it came to the company you kept because your caregivers were making that decision for you. But as you grew older, you started to develop tastes and inclinations. You realised the type of friends you liked and didn't like. Throughout the aging process, you were gravitating towards some humans, sometimes to one more than the other. 

Every choice of friends you make and keep close in your life will determine your success or your downfall. Do not be cheated into thinking it's a matter of the law of attraction. People will come in and out of your life regardless. But you are the gatekeeper, and you decide who you reject or retain. And whoever you retain will ultimately affect your success, your failures, your level of contentment, fulfillment and peace of mind. 

You're allowed to be picky about the people you expose yourself to. This is not always a case of being a snob. Negativity is something that can rub off on you. You need to be precise about the energy you allow to be around you if you can. Let that person mean well for you and vice versa. Pick friends who are more than worldly currency. Pick friends who make you better than when you met them by the way they enrich your character. And character is half of faith in your Deen. and your friend is a reflection of your Deen. They will either curse you on the day of account or you will be close and intertwined because you loved each other for Allah's sake. 

So if you care about the way you carry yourself, your character, your faith, your modesty, it's only fair that your friend should do the same.